Thursday, June 6, 2013

Thank You Note

Long ago my husband's mom said  "my kids have been difficult children"  and in my 20 year old puny little brain I thought, "well if you were a good parent and followed through they wouldn't be."  I'm glad my internal monologue stayed internal on that one because it came back to bite me in the butt- BIG TIME.

Turns out that its genetic.  Why do I know this?  Because many of the cousins on my husband's side have similar children (mostly the boys) and they aren't easy.  They have ADHD, are bullheaded, push the limits of everyone and are opinionated from a very early age.  I was a compliant people pleaser and I truly thought that every person aspires to be just like I was/am.

Keegan is a particularly challenging child.  And he is wonderful!  I frequently find myself thinking that people are probably judging me the way that I judged my first mother-in-law.  Maybe if she had lived past 44 I would have grown to respect her more.  Maybe she could have guided me in raising these "tough" kids. 

Out of desperation I have been using essential oils on him (Jeddy's Blend of doTerra oils) in addition to his medication.  I don't know if its the oils or time/maturity but I have seen minuscule and wonderful improvements.  And honestly, I don't really care what is helping because it is.

Yesterday he came home from school with a little bag that said Mr. and Mrs. Smith.  That is unusual.  I opened it up and inside was a tootsie roll and a note.  The note was a thank you from his teacher.  She wrote that she was so happy that we had been such understanding and good parents to work with. 
She said that Keegan is a special kid and that he is so lucky to have parents like us to guide him and be there for him.  That we will make all the difference in the world for him.  That was the thing I needed to renew my confidence as a parent. 

So for everyone who judges me because my kid won't sit still in church, is impulsive, and reads below grade level.  Maybe take a day to be with me and my child.  You can see for yourself that through love and patience I have learned how to work with this little person.  This little person who is so challenging and difficult AND who is so full of love and tenderness

Wednesday, June 5, 2013

Twu Wuv! Just like the Princess Bride?

Yesterday I was urgently needed to film a detective show written and directed by my 8 year old.  Oh and need I mention he was the star and only actor in this Emmy Award Winning Drama?

This was after a day from hell where I really wanted more than anything in the world to curl up with a book and a glass of wine.  I had just finished "saving the day!" from the person who was supposed to organize the graduation reception.  Yes, the cakes were ordered and so were the flowers.  But at the last minute she was unable to pick them up and get them to the school.  I raced out of work as soon as I could and ran to Costco.  Got everything into my ginormous cart and went to pay.  Only find out I HAD NO CHECKS AND COSTCO DOESN'T TAKE CREDIT CARDS!!!!!!!!!!!   But alas I have an American Express that I never use.  So we ran it and it declined.  I don't know the number to run my credit as debit- I know, its me, I should learn that number.  So they kindly put the whole mess into the cooler while I ran home to get a new checkbook that actually had checks.

I picked up Keegan and went back to Costco.  My husband was home and said "what can I do to help you?"  Note these words- K!  I said just get Daniel from Bountiful and get him to rehearsal on time.  And I flew out the door, back to Costco and made it in record time to the school.  I didn't say one mean word to the person who was in charge of the reception.  I just politely hauled everything in and pretended it was no big deal.  But based on the fact that every teacher I saw and I mean every one of them gave me a hug and told me thanks for saving the day, it was apparently a big deal.  I chatted a bit and then decided to just get something to take home for dinner.  I called B and said "did you take Keegan with you to go get Daniel?" And he said, "I am just leaving now"  Are you f-ing kidding.  It was 5:45 and D needed to be at rehearsal at 6:30.  We live 25 miles from his friend's house and then its another 20 back to the theater.  Because I was closer to the freeway I ran to Bountiful and again, saved the day, getting him to rehearsal a mere 7 minutes late.  Yes, a few traffic laws were broken......

I arrived home exhausted and angry that two people had let me down and so my peaceful night was ruined.  I walked dejected into the house only to be enthusiastically greeted by Keegan who had big plans for the night and they all included ME!  He was dressed to the nines in his detective outfit and had already worked out the script in his head.  How do you say no to that?!  Especially when it means he will be doing something-playing- instead of sitting in front of a computer or watching a movie.  That my friends is how I found the evidence of true love.  Its spray painted all over the back side of his climbing wall.  I love J! I love J!  Its unbelievably sweet and it made up for all my own personal woes.

*about the spray paint- um guilty- I had let him spray paint an old board to use for part of his club house.  I taught him how to spell words with spray paint......  And then I left the cans out where he could get them.  And really, location to spray was fine so I didn't say a word.  I just smiled at his expression of love!

Tuesday, June 4, 2013

First Crush!

About a month ago we were driving to the Hoedown at school and Keegan said "I have a crush on a girl.  Do you want to guess who it is?"  I started naming girls and just kept getting a no for the answer.  Then he said he might not even tell me if I guessed it.

We finished up with our square dancing and headed out to the car.  I was in a hurry for my audition and needed to get out of there.  Keegan kept hanging back saying he needed to say good bye to his friends.  Exasperated I kept reminding him he already said goodbye to A, C and I.  Finally he said he needed to say goodbye to J.  UM weird maybe that's the girl.  They are kind of friends but not super good friends.

On the way home he confessed that it was J.  I had texted I's mom and asked her to scope it out for me since Keegan surly would have told I.  She confirmed that indeed it was J.

A few weeks later he said "why do I feel so happy when J is around?"  Its love I tell you.  Hearts and violins and a little cupid in the background.  So sweet.

He tells everyone that he already has a girlfriend.  And man is he proud of it.

There was a short break up when N told J that Keegan and I are bullies and she shouldn't be their friend.  But that got resolved and the crush is back on.  If this is happening in 3rd grade, I fear the future with my little Romeo.